“They call it demon possession,” she
said, her hands
busy struggling to open a
beer bottle
that was already opened.
“Maybe you should
stop drinking,” I said. “It really
looks like you’ve had enough.”
but of course
she doesn’t hear that. She only
hears what she wants to
People talk to her
but their words have
to pass through
the thinnest filter I’ve ever seen
her mind
So because she didn’t hear me, or
rather her mind did not
register my words and
their meaning, she went on with
her story and
with trying to open an
already opened beer bottle.
“I think I was only… um, sixteen. On that
night I shot my older brother in his
sleep. Killed him dead.
Stole his keys and took his
car and went for…
what d’ you call that?”
“A joy ride?” I said
“Hahahah! Yeah. A joy ride.”
Now she did hear me. Cuz I
behaved according to
her script
“I did not crash the
car. Didn’t even scratch it! I never
went through driver’s ed
but still I drove
better than my bro. I was made
for driving. But then, you know, I just
returned home
and I told my mother everything
that happened. With a smile on my pretty
face. I mean, it was super pretty
back then. You should’ve seen me.
I have pics, but they’re still nothing
like the real thing.
You would’ve soooo wanted to
fuck me back then, I guarantee.”
“I would’ve been fourteen
back then,” I said. “Would you have
left a boy two years your
junior hit?”
But it was another thing
her mind didn’t
register
“It’s all I could think about. I don’t know,
is it weird to say that… That
a car ride, that joy ride had
caused my sexual awakening?
Perhaps the surge
of adrenaline caused me to
become immeasurably… um, horny.
D’ you think it’s weird?”
“Nothing’s weird
at this point,” I said, actually
taking the beer bottle away
from her hand
Immediately
her hands went to her
hair
and grabbed at random
and pulled
playfully
while she bit her lips.
“Ah, a long story follows.
Mother called the authorities
and I was taken
into this… uh, this place for
troubled teens. Was too young to
go to prison, haha.
And the biggest issue here was…
I mean, I was really disappointed. Not
one, not a single one of
the staff members
wanted to… you know, to do
it with me. Not the men, not the
women. Not even the other
teenagers.
Can you believe this shit?
All those stereotypes of
mental asylum workers abusing
their patients… Fake! All of them.
Couldn’t even get
a smile from them, let alone
a fuck.
And eventually they quenched
this desire of mine. With
meds.
I don’t even know what they
gave me, but
in time, they numbed me for good.
And now… I don’t even make
the difference
between penetration
and wiping with toilet paper.
Feels the same to me.
What good is a body if it can’t
make love?”
“It can tell stories,” I said
At this
she smiled
and leaned over
and took the
beer bottle from me
and drank
I’m still not sure
if my words
were registered into
her mind
or not
but maybe not knowing
makes it even
better
Many thanks to LatinosUSA —English edition for featuring my poem, "nothing's weird at this point"!
Check it out HERE!

Thank you!
