the TV was blaring political crap again somewhere in the background
always the same fear inducing story
but she didn't need the political turmoil in the country and the world at large to make her feel afraid
She looked at Leonardo, her turtle through the glass of the tank
"Soon enough we'll be evicted. I've seen homeless people with dogs and cats and even birds, but never a turtle. What the hell am I gonna do with you, Leo?"
Perched on top of its wet rock, the turtle looked at her and not at her at the same time
There was no fear, no anxiety, no trouble in its eyes
it simply existed
was alive
It just was
"You're just too dumb to get it," she said
got up and went in the other room to turn off the TV
"You're just too dumb to get it," she said to her own reflection in the black mirror of the TV screen
Right
now back to playing the electric guitar in her empty room
lying in bed
drinking the cheapest whiskey
attempting to play with herself and failing because of depression
giving up
drinking some more
eventually falling asleep
One time Leonardo showed up into her dream as a guitar with a turtle's carapace and it said to her, "Too dumb to get it? Hah! Says she who can't even live in the now and constantly tries to be someone else somewhere else in another time. Dumbest shit anyone can do, really."
"I was raised in a strict Christian home," he said as he poured another glass of whiskey. "That's why I turned atheist right after I left to be on my own."
"At 18?" I asked
"Nope. At 24."
I liked the guy. He was somewhere in his late fifties looking forward to pensioning
worked as janitor in an office building
and the reason they all called him crazy was that he swore he saw someone in the women's bathroom right after closing time as he went to clean
A female figure standing by the mirror
she must've been real, he said, because her presence activated the sensor lights in the room
It was a story I've heard dozens of times
And I don't care how real it is
I believe him because I want to
I want the story to be real
Had he not had a story like that to share we wouldn't have been friends today
"Wanna hear my advice?" I asked him. And without him saying anything I went on. "Don't quit. This job... is perfect. Trust me."